the diamonds on skid row.

a (somewhat) personal tumblog of ROCELLO.

10 Things to Keep You Up-To-Date with My Life.

I feel so shitty about not having the opportunity in the past to write anything on my blog, or even shared at least a bit of useful shit on the internet. Truth is, it’s been one hell of a year for me. 2014 was and is the year of Coming of Age. I am starting to feel like I am “coming of age”. If you don’t know what that means, google it. Jk. It’s like what someone has to go through to come from childhood to adulthood. This year is definitely that year where I am ready and scared and fearless enough to take on the future and still learn from the past as I take this leap of faith with life. I have 10 things about my life to keep you up-to-date.

Excuse my vocabulary or the words I have chosen for the post. Disclaimer: I did smoke a few minutes before writing this.

Anyway, With that said. Let me fill you in with much of what has been happening in my life. #1. I fell in love. #2. I was heart-broken. Before we move on to the next #’s. I would like to focus on these two things. “I fell in love.” Wow. What an amazing opportunity. I fell in love “finally” with somebody. I cannot believe this is happening feeling. In terms on keeping this person’s identity sacred, I will not bring in details and names and issues. But all I have to say is that: Relationships are responsibilities, if you ain’t ready… you ain’t ready. Don’t force it. You can have love without the relationship. That’s all that matters is the love. Relationships just have the label for it. Friendships with your ex’s will be difficult, but Always remember to put yourself first and love yourself. Lesson on Life by Rocello. You are very welcome. 

#3. Fashion internship. More like Fashion intern-shit. Just kidding. It is an amazing opportunity. It’s not all glam in what you see in all the shows but, Fashion is cut throat and fierce. It’s definitely giving me that thicker skin I always needed, the courage to try something new, and a fiercer walk to shed some calories. It’s my life for the summer. I will work and werk. Future plans to delve into fashion as a career? Eh, Maybs not… but at least I tried and enjoyed and learned. Even though I am going to school for Speech Therapy, in the words of lindsay lohan “The limit does not exist.” then my life should have no limits. 

#4. Friendship is everything. People have alot to say. They have chatter-breath up in the club or bar. But as long as a diva has her girls and a nigga has his boys, then we good. Everyone else can shut the fuck up. But f’real. Friendships are important to keep you grounded and supplement a life worth living. Keep loyal. Show them love. And Enjoy! 

#5. Careers are pulling me in so many directions. I have no idea what to do with my life. But that is the beauty of it all… I don’t know. I’m young, confident, confused, lonely, and free. I am 21 years old. I have nothing to worry about.

#6. I love LA GAYS. This ties back to the “Friendship is everything” schpeel. It’s true. I love my gays. Haha. Working at the Outfest Film Festival for the summer really got me in touch with my sexuality in a positive way…. (not HIV+) lol. It’s a joke. 

#7. Working with Kids? Ah. Who knew? So for a brief two weeks (as I am writing this I am here in Loma Linda) I am involved with this Literature Camp for kids 4+. It is the cutest thing ever. The lifestyle of a future SLP is looking so good and if I get to work with these rugrats in the future I am more than happy. It has been everyone’s shock to see that I am actually really good with children. I am. I love them. Someone, please wife me.

#8. BEST 21st BIRTHDAY EVER. The people who made it possible. I love you all. So many memories that will last a lifetime. So happy. So blessed.

#9. Family? The more I spend time with them the more I notice that maybe I don’t belong here and I need to be me. Nothing against them, it’s just we are different people. I need to be me.

#10. My weight. It’s still a battle. Some days are good and some are bad. So far so good. But as I said, it’s a battle. It’s a struggle. I’m getting through it.

If you ask me, expressing yourself means taking that first step out of your comfort zone and stating your claim on the world. We say “Here I am, and this is what I have to say!” We all have done it. We notice how the world operates and we wanna change that. Opening up our arms and using our voice in great magnitude. Expressing yourself is powerful and requires much strength and courage.

But many times in life we have those small moments of hesitation. Those moments where we are about to cross that line out of safety. We feel scared like we want to retreat back on our bed or blend in the camouflage faces of society.  It’s the fight or flight instinct we know very well. And it’s an easy decision to make if you’re brave enough.  

The tingling fingers, the butterfly stomach. Then comes the voice that stops the crowd of chatter. Here you are. There you are. Let them know what you have to say. The light slowly rises behind you. You lift your head up and your hands gesture along with your words. A smile crosses your face. After you finish what you have to say, you look out into the crowd waiting for a response… 

… a response that doesn’t matter. You said what you need to say. Drop the mike. Get off the stage. Relax your muscles. You’ve expressed yourself.

Do we cross that finish line or do we run along with the rest of the human race? Do we stand out and accept ourselves fully and whole heartedly. 

A Day Through Instagram Photos

"LACMA, Rachel Zoe Booksigning, Dinner with Dad." (3.29.13)

A Day Through Instagram Photos.

"Griffith and MOCA." (03.28.14)